turning off the stress faucet

I'm in the midst of a really stressful situation. It involves money, acquaintances, neighbors, friends, and lots of blame and he said-she said. Suffice it to say it's entirely unpleasant and extremely stressful, especially as I seem to be the key player in terms of who gets scolded and/or dumped on.

Today I had three back-to-back phone calls from people relating to this Stressful Issue and was near tears during all three of them. To my surprise, I kept my wits about me and didn't start to cry. (If I start to cry, then everything goes to the3 dogs: my arguments, my careful planning, my usually diplomatic nature, and so on.) After the first phone call ended, I cried--I admit it. But I didn't cry DURING the call, so I still appear tough and vigilant! Ha. My boyfriend, whose praises I've lauded before, encouraged me to stop crying, knowing full well that a Migraine storms in full-blast after I burst into tears. After a minute or two of indulgence, I got it together and followed his advice.

Not crying doesn't mean you don't want to, though, and it doesn't make the stress any better. Crying, for the most part, relieves my stress for an instant but tends to have rough payouts later, as a headache most certainly comes marching along eventually.

It's after nine at night and I have the beginnings of a Migraine attack, my third one in four days. I cannot give in. Somehow it feels like getting a Migraine will mean admitting the stressful situation has won out. And that just makes me even more riled up.

Grrr!

Growlingly yours,
TMG