In the last few weeks, I've felt better than usual on my good days but worse than usual on my bad days. That is to say, the pains are more painful and the comfortable days aren't marked by as much pain.
Yesterday I had a particularly stressful day full of assignments and work. The stress was only compounded by the fact that I seem to have misplaced my motivation and gusto for anything other than reading books and writing on my own. I blame part of my distractability on my withdrawal from Effexor XR, which brings up strange little side effects. The rest? My fault. My laziness.
In any case, I met some friends out but didn't last long. I started to get a slight "ponytail headache," the kind where your hair follicles actually start to ache from the pain of holding all your hair up in a small rubber band. Only thing was, I had no rubber band in. At least it wasn't a Migraine, right? 'Cause my Migraines almost always start behind my left eye with dash of right eyeball attention. My town no longer allows smoking indoors, but my hypersensitive nostrils still caught plenty of sharp whiffs of the cigarettes people were puffing on directly outside the open door. The pain behind my nose and cheeks intensified; the throbbing in the very center of my head staked its claim on my skull and encouraged me to call it a night.
Because I am fearful of taking Relpax + naprosyn every time I feel a headache coming on (more coming on that fear in a later entry), I avoided the drugs by going to bed. Woke up about 3 hours earlier than usual with throbbing pain that wouldn't leave me alone. Gave in and took the meds and am already worried about tomorrow's rebound headache that will most likely manifest itself as soon as my intensive 10-hour work day begins.
In the meantime, I tilt the computer screen back so it barely sends its glow to me, and I squint my eyes in pain as I scroll through the menus on my cell phone, trying to call the pharmacy for even more prescription refills my insurance no longer covers...
Pity party is now declared...over!